10 tips for staying sexual after menopause


Think that “the change” means the end to good sex?  Think again.  With a few key tweaks, the best sex is yet to come.  No matter what age a woman goes through menopause, hot flashes and vaginal dryness do not have to end one of life’s most pleasurable experiences.  With a few suggestions on how to keep your love life hot and satisfying, sex post-menopause can be some of the best sex you’ll ever have.  In fact, many women report sexual frequency and enjoyment actually gets better with age – kind of like a fine wine that only improves with time.  During this phase of life, women are often more self-confident and self-assured feeling free to tell their lover what they want in bed, making the relationship grow and deepen. 

To keep the momentum of your lovemaking strong, here are a few ways to take your sex life to a whole new level:

1.     Fan the flames with fantasy

Nothing gets things steamy quite like an active imagination.  In this case, using the most powerful sex organ you have – your brain – to daydream up whatever sexual fantasies it can concoct. Test the waters of your sexual side to see what turns you on to get the fulfillment you deserve.

2.     Keep doing kegels

Kegel exercises are well known for strengthening the pelvic floor muscles particularly after childbirth which can reduce incontinence.  But they have an added bonus of keeping your sex life sizzling - reduced pain during intercourse and are associated with improved orgasms.

3.     Stay in shape

A woman who keeps herself in shape over the years will often look better at this age than when she was younger.  There’s nothing that turns a man on more than a woman who cares enough to keep her body toned and looking its best.

4.     No one else is in the house except you and your partner

By the time many women go through menopause, their children have been raised and have flown the coop.  This means it’s just you and your partner left alone to not have to worry about small feet wandering into your private space catching you in compromising positions.  There’s a feeling of once again being free allowing you to be more spontaneous and open with when and where sex occurs.

5.     Lubricate

Using lubrication can make sex more exciting and pleasurable. Many couples experiment with it during foreplay leading to new positions and techniques.  Post-menopausal women who experience vaginal dryness should make this a regular part of their nightly routine to keep things spiced up and ready.

6.     R-rated foods

Nothing quite sets the mood for love than a romantic home-cooked meal.  Eating the right kinds of foods not only make things sizzle in the kitchen but also extends into the bedroom.  There’s a growing body of evidence that some vitamins and components in foods can enhance sexual function with certain foods known for their aphrodisiac qualities.  Avocadoes, oysters, almonds, strawberries, figs, and arugula have those qualities to start the fires burning.

7.     Initiate intimacy

Sex is one of the most intimate acts a couple can engage in and as we age, intimacy should start outside of the bedroom.  Starting early in the day and lasting throughout little things like wakeup kisses, hand holding, whispering sweet nothings to one another will heighten desire for the ultimate intimacy act of lovemaking.

8.     Exercise improves libido

Making your health a priority by exercising faithfully can amp up your libido leading to great sex.   If you are unhealthy physically and emotionally, sex drive will suffer.  A healthy diet, regular exercise and adequate sleep are key components to a healthy sex drive.

9.     Sex keeps the vagina healthy

There’s a misconception that once a woman goes through menopause, the vagina shrivels and dries up like a prune.  It will go through some changes due to the loss of estrogen but many women don’t notice any changes at all. One change is blood flow to the vagina can lessen but this is where sex can help.  The more sex you have at this stage of life, the more blood flow to this area as it stimulates the vagina keeping it healthy.

10.  Pleasure yourself

Masturbation can be done solo or in front of your partner. It’s a great tool for relieving stress, increasing blood flow and improving sexual response.  It has also been shown to enhance your relationship with your partner and increase desire for one another.